FROM AFROS TO SHELLTOES BLOG » Blog Archive » Ask Ed & Sugar: Love TKO Chris Brown Rihanna Beatdown

Ask Ed & Sugar: Love TKO Chris Brown Rihanna Beatdown

11 February 2009 8 Comments

Everyday I hear a new story about Chris Brown and Rihanna. Did Chris Brown really hit Rihanna? What do you guys think is happening?

Sharon, Columbia, SC

Sugar’s Take

My common sense tells me that something happened. Was it assault with a deadly weapon? I doubt it. That brother would’ve definitely been posting some serious bail. And he would’ve had more than bruises on his knuckles. This seems to be a classic case of extreme drama. I believe the only person who knows what happened is the person who called 911. Somebody needs to be interviewing them (if they haven’t already).

I’m a little bothered by some of the sudden reports on the turbulence of their relationship. If anything, I thought Rihanna would’ve been mad at Mr. Brown for getting his dance on with Ciara. The cameraperson zoomed in on Rihanna’s face with a purpose when that performance was going down. Since then, there have been numerous pictures of the cute couple shopping and hangin’ with family.

I hope nothing did happen cuz it really won’t be a good example fo’ da’ kids. Even though we all do, or have done things, that may not make for the best example. Right now, this situation is only bringing up more questions. Here are a few of mine:

Is this just to distract us from the young man that got shot by cops in the Bay Area?
Is Chris Brown really that crazy?
Did Chris Brown realize he was in public?
What did Rihanna say or do to make him so mad?
Was she being a pain in the neck as early as when they were getting dressed and he couldn’t take anymore?
Who in the world called 911?
Why is Rihanna not pressing charges?
Is the state gonna take the case?
Does Chris Brown have a good lawyer?

Ed’s Take

Sadly, it’s a wrap for Chris Brown. Even if the allegations prove to be false, the damage is done. He has already lost endorsements (Wrigley’s Gum and the Got Milk? campaign) and is losing a heated battle in the court of public opinion. There are old school rules. Hitting women, or the implication that you may have, puts you on the wrong side of the law.

We often underestimate the prevalence of domestic violence. And I can tell you from my years of work in male development as a counselor– with organizations like Men Stopping Violence and Raleigh North Carloina’s Teen Fest–there can be Jekyll & Hyde tendencies in many closet abusers. Now, I am not saying that Brother Brown is guilty. But, just because he is smoother than a double mint twin in commercials, has a baby face, and makes safe pop tunes that women adore does not mean he is not capable of violence. Remember, Miles Davis, a musical genius who I luv to death, made some of the smoothest tunes on earth. But when he left the stage, his temper and abusive tendencies towards women were notorious.

Instead of rushing to judgment, we all should stop and reflect. What is most fascinating, to me, is the role the entertainment industry, a haven for misogyny and unchecked seedy behavior, may have played in this real life drama. Label reps, handlers, publicists, and entourages often act as enablers instead of challenging stars on questionable behavior for fear of losing their meal ticket.

Despite being mega super stars, Chris Brown and Rihanna are still young, impressionable, and highly susceptible to the same peer pressures of folks their age. Maturing under crushing spotlights is sure to have an impact on your personal development. The key is to be surrounded by individuals who can assist in navigating the turbulent road of success and extreme solitude of failure.

At best, we will discover that all the blogs, news reports, and speculations were much to do about nothing. At worst, Brother Brown will become state property. I worry less about their careers, and more about how they will heal emotionally. Spiritual shout outs are in order.

[end_columns]

Got a question; email us askedandsugar@afrostoshelltoes.com!!!

Between catching the uptown train to conduct “we luv the kids” writing workshops to dancing rumba on the lower eastside, Sugar Johnson flaunts his creative freedom in various mediums. The actor, vocalist, and educator have not only shared the stage with prolific artists such as The Last Poets, M-1 of Dead Prez, Jessica Care Moore, and Spike Lee, but he also labors to cultivate the forgotten souls of Rikers Island. Johnson made his film debut in Dave Chappelle’s Block Party. The ASCAP member holds a B.A. in Mathematics from DePauw University and will release the poetry collection Food Clothes and Shelter on his imprint Home Grown Publishing, LLC in 2008.

Award winning writer, educator, counselor, and activist Edward M. Garnes, Jr. is the founder of From Afros to Shelltoes: Art, Action, and Conversation, a nationally acclaimed series of cultural productions confronting the social divide between elders and hip hop heads, and holds a B.A. in English Writing from DePauw University and a M.A. in Counseling from Michigan State University . His seminal essay, ” Sweet Tea Ethics: Black Luv, Healthcare, and Cultural Mistrust,” currently appears in Not In My Family: AIDS in the African American Community, a 2007 NAACP Image Award nominated collection edited by Gil Robertson. (www.afrostoshelltoes.com).

8 Comments »

Tia S said:

Awesome perspective Ed!!!

# 11 February 2009 at 12:26 pm

damaris said:

great work fellas

# 11 February 2009 at 1:26 pm

Charlene Sanders said:

You are right about Chris Brown. It will never be the same for him. I can’t help but wonder “What the hell was he thinking of to go off on her like that” yet I am just as curious and wonder “What the hell did she say or do to make him put his hands on her for any reason.”

I don’t think we have the full story. We don’t know what happened in that car or outside of the car so far as I’ve heard. All we know is that she ended up with injuries??? What really happended beginning to end? I don’t prejudge him or her. It’s just a sad story.

MY OPINION…those who are close to Chris and Rihanna will know what happened and they need to treat them as village people. We need not abandon either of them regardless of the truth of what actually happened. They should hold each of them accountable to the degree that they were at fault. Whoever did wrong has to be accountable and responsible for their part. We can’t give out any passes or “that’s okay”. The responsible party(ies) have to know they’ve done wrong so it doesn’t happen again and/or they seek and get help. However if either of them did nothing wrong to the other and they we wronged, they shouln’t be publicly pursecuted when we in the public will never know what the real story is. We can’t tear them down unless we aim to build them back up and fogive them. We should act like village people and be there for them. Tough love is a great thing…Sad story indeed.

I digress…

# 11 February 2009 at 5:21 pm

Barry D said:

Just a little food for thought…there are three(3) sides to every story; his,her’s, and the truth. Let’s not get in judgment,decision making attitudes about this situation,we were not there at the time…but I’m recommending all readers to treat the story as you would want the story to be accepted/treated if it was you in this situation. And yes Ed, spiritual restoration is definetly in order…it could be one of us the next time….prayer changes things.Thank you.

BarryD
“IT’S YOUR TURN ENTERPRISES”
CEO/Founder

# 11 February 2009 at 8:11 pm

Gus Mayweather said:

I have a question, what made Chris Brown hit (allegedly) Rihanna on black history month?

# 11 February 2009 at 8:20 pm

Dana said:

This whole thing is ridiculous.
Unfortunately it is a wrap for Chris Brown.
I heard he bit her!
What the…?
Nothing a woman says or does can justify a man
(or boy in Brown’s case)
biting or hitting a female.

# 12 February 2009 at 11:22 pm

angeloveny said:

Awesome! Nicely said…on both sides, and Ed “I worry less about their careers, and more about how they will heal emotionally. Spiritual shout outs are in order.”…no sh!t!, that was supreme (1st word that came to my head for real) of you! Your so smooth!!
Keep writing!

XOXO

# 13 February 2009 at 12:57 am

steph said:

i think every1 needs 2 stop hatin on chris brown!! he obvs wasnt that bad cause she has taken him back!! i realli hope he does anova tour in the uk cause his last 1 was wicked……i still love him! and i think every1 needs 2 mind dere own business!! n leave dem 2 it!!! carry on chris!! whoop whoop

xxxxxxxxxxxx

# 11 March 2009 at 9:30 am